Russ, My Love

     I dated Mike for a year when I was in college.  When I realized he was a great guy but not the right guy for me, I broke up with him.  I knew the right guy was Russ.  I knew either he was the right guy for me or there was an identical male somewhere that was.  We vacillated between being friends and dating throughout the years, and all I knew was that I wanted to be around with him irrespective of how we labelled it.  I fully enjoyed his company.  We had fun, laughed, enjoyed adventures, and he, of course, was handsome, thoughtful, chivalrous...

     Currently, our life is comfortable.  We have routines and a way of moving throughout our days, weeks, and years as if guided internally.  We each shoulder different responsibilities and others we share.  He has different interests than I, yet we also share common passions.  We have each changed and grown, but we've been blessed to do it in a way that's more parallel than divergent.  I remember my Daddy sharing this about a good marriage, "You have to not have expectations.  When you have expectations of another person, you saying you're not happy with who they are.  You have to love who they are and not expect them to be anything else."  I loved hearing that, and I have tried to remember it often... like when I expect Russ to read my mind (Why in the world would I even?)... or when I've planned out a day in my head without telling anyone about it and am frustrated when it doesn't play out... LOL.  Silly Verlana.

     I am not in love with what Russ and his talents provide for our family, but I am in love with who he is inside.  He is still thoughtful, and I get to see that characteristic played out not only toward me but our boys.  He is forgiving- over and over again.  He still holds my hand and opens any door (when I remember to let him).  He is so very intelligent it's intimidating.  ;)  He is adventurous and loves spending time with us.  He is a great listener and gives solid advice.  He is driven and compassionate.  He has great mirror neurons.

     Russ will listen to my rambling, convoluted stories (for YEARS, people!) and not roll his eyes.  He is a complete partner, and we share decisions, desires, plans, and everything.  He wants to be with me whether running errands, doing chores, or something more exciting.  I think you know how awesome that feels when someone wants to be with you no matter you're doing.  It's not about the stuff, but it's just about the company.  After 17 years, he still loves to be with me.  He's proud of me.  He will let me know how I could do something better, but he'll sandwich it with tact and love.  (Not to say I can swallow that information without choking, but he TRIES to make it easy.)

     I could write so much about how wonderful he is as a father, but I'm keeping this between us.  :)  I am still deeply in love with him and incredibly thankful for having him by my side.  I just felt like I needed to say this despite any birthday, Father's Day, or another occasion.  There's no reason to put off expressing love.  We don't have to save it for a day marked on a calendar.  Just let it out!